From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
