So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
