Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
