school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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