okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
