peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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