No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
two words: eviction party
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
