pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
