I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
