it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I'm at about main and main street
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
