i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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