Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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