How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
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