Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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