You're completely useless in the revolution.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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