I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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