Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize