Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
pray to the hookup gods
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