You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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