We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drake has all the answers
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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