these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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