i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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