You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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