I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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