Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
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im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
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Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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