Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
