it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
