You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
