Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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