AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
