You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
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there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
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It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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