Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.

(773): View more from Illinois

You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal

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(312): Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight. (773): You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal http://tfl.nu/9vmu

Replies (9) Good night (1850) Bad night (872)
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(913): View more from Kansas

omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand

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(913): omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand http://tfl.nu/y2lh

Replies (10) Good night (813) Bad night (1733)
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(216): View more from Ohio

Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.

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(216): Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened. http://tfl.nu/9qga

Replies (16) Good night (1222) Bad night (4715)
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(360): View more from Washington

We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.

(1-360): View more from Washington

I absolutely love you.

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(360): We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it. (1-360): I absolutely love you. http://tfl.nu/vd5p

Replies (40) Good night (10814) Bad night (882)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it

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(201): I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it http://tfl.nu/a65q

Replies (16) Good night (4009) Bad night (1123)
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(804): View more from Virginia

If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.

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(804): If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline. http://tfl.nu/1m8c

Replies (23) Good night (3796) Bad night (1072)
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(636): View more from Missouri

there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter

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(636): there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter http://tfl.nu/6rqt

Replies (3) Good night (2522) Bad night (1069)
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(352): View more from Florida

I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.

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(352): I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern. http://tfl.nu/54kf

Replies (16) Good night (4011) Bad night (1053)
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(209): View more from California

I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.

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(209): I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting. http://tfl.nu/cws8

Replies (23) Good night (959) Bad night (3233)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test

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(910): I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test http://tfl.nu/ucs5

Replies (4) Good night (2049) Bad night (610)
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(207): View more from Maine

I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.

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(207): I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive. http://tfl.nu/8kly

Replies (6) Good night (1320) Bad night (518)
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(775): View more from Nevada

At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment

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(775): At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment http://tfl.nu/1isz

Replies (5) Good night (919) Bad night (405)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.

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(978): I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk. http://tfl.nu/nl8z

Replies (2) Good night (485) Bad night (734)
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(540): View more from Virginia

GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!

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(540): GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES! http://tfl.nu/r84w

Replies (2) Good night (594) Bad night (313)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?

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(314): Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover? http://tfl.nu/atlc

Replies (1) Good night (305) Bad night (543)

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