I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
