too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
