"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.