Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
