I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
