Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
