Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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