Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize