Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
