the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
