I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
