I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
