people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
