Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
