When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
