Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(314): View more from Missouri

My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.

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(314): My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control. http://tfl.nu/vcg1

Replies (9) Good night (1045) Bad night (2935)
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(646): View more from New York

I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback

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(646): I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback http://tfl.nu/fcgu

Replies (22) Good night (3440) Bad night (880)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?

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(502): Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv? http://tfl.nu/2eve

Replies (15) Good night (2003) Bad night (769)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.

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(267): My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester. http://tfl.nu/b6od

Replies (2) Good night (1290) Bad night (3220)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.

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(918): WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW. http://tfl.nu/fz7p

Replies (9) Good night (1233) Bad night (4042)
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(602): View more from Arizona

Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.

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(602): Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world. http://tfl.nu/6f3f

Replies (53) Good night (1441) Bad night (8204)
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(406): View more from Montana

Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.

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(406): Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues. http://tfl.nu/jvdq

Replies (7) Good night (761) Bad night (1399)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.

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(919): being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her. http://tfl.nu/7get

Replies (13) Good night (1983) Bad night (562)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.

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(901): A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird. http://tfl.nu/mrcn

Replies (10) Good night (1334) Bad night (498)
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(469): View more from Texas

I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5

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(469): I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5 http://tfl.nu/xzh8

Replies (10) Good night (867) Bad night (756)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.

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(910): I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy. http://tfl.nu/uqk4

Replies (2) Good night (1025) Bad night (381)
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(+27): View more from South Africa

Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.

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(+27): Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on. http://tfl.nu/4hb1

Replies (1) Good night (663) Bad night (371)
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(727): View more from Florida

Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.

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(727): Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension. http://tfl.nu/xvwt

Replies (5) Good night (569) Bad night (299)
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(217): View more from Illinois

He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "

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(217): He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick " http://tfl.nu/w39y

Replies (2) Good night (714) Bad night (300)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.

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(412): its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game. http://tfl.nu/gy0r

Replies (8) Good night (675) Bad night (304)

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