I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize