Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
we're so committed to being not committed
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
