My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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